Session Start: Thu Feb 11 1999


Eddie Izzard: Hello I'm late but I'm here now!

Picadilly: How do you deal with the different timings? Americans have much slower timing.

Eddie Izzard: What do you mean by timings, Picadilly? Do you mean the audiences are slower?

Picadilly: Brits deliver then line much quicker

Eddie Izzard: Picadilly I stay at the same speed. I assume all human beings are as intelligent as each other.

RaMOANa: Eddie, when will your site (www.izzard.com) have pics of you (and reviews) in Velvet Goldmine?

Eddie Izzard: Jerry Divine is not based upon Tony DeFries. No way, I based him on my dad (legal reasons)

BowiefromHolland: Eddie how has u studdied Tonny Defries for your role in velvet goldmine (well done!!)

Host "Electric Warrior": Eddie - what would have the late, great Marc Bolan thought of Velvet Goldmine?

BowiefromHolland: Eddie have you ever done a show in Holland. When can we expect you?

Eddie Izzard: I will be doing more shows in Paris at the end of the year, but I am not sure when I will be back to Holland. Soon, I hope. I'll try and get my videos on sale there.

Zardoz: Eddie, Do you speak any other languages than French?

Eddie Izzard: I speak some German as well, but I intend to do shows in German, Spanish and Italian at some time (before I die)

Stumpy: Eddie, when you get the chance...are you pleased with the sell out Wembley gig...for personal reasons, or because it's for the Prince's Trust?

Eddie Izzard: Yes I am pleased that Wembley has sold out (purely for ego reasons)

KelMarSupervixen: What do you think of the late Lenny Bruce?

Eddie Izzard: I think he was a great standup and he did stuff using characters from history which I like to do.

Total Blam Blam: Wouldn't it be a coincidence if you settled down with a girl called Lizzie Lizzard?

Eddie Izzard: No.

Picadilly: What comic has most inspired you?

Eddie Izzard: Richard Pryor, Steve Martin and Billy Connolly

Bianca: How did you become involved to narrate the Bowie-special "Legends"?

Eddie Izzard: David Bowie begged me and I reluctantly agreed.

RaMOANa: Will you do any shows on the East coast or even better, Florida, if so where?

Eddie Izzard: At the end of the year I should be doing gigs in New York (definitely) and Boston and Atlanta (maybe).

FruJu: Eddie: how do you view English versus US versus rest-of-the-world humour? Is one more subtle, more black, more whatever than the other?

Eddie Izzard: I think there are no national senses of humour. The best American comedy compares with the best British comedy and the best Italian comedy (See Life

Eddie Izzard: (Life is Beautiful)

Host "Electric Warrior": Eddie - are you doing any stand-up or just sit down chat on the Dennis Miller Show tomorrow night

Eddie Izzard: Just sit-down on the Dennis Miller show.

KelMarSupervixen: Do you believe, as so many do, that Pee Wee Herman is a comic God?

Host "Electric Warrior": go Kel go!!!!!!!!

Eddie Izzard: I haven't seen much of PeeWee's stuff, but Paul Reubens is very funny on the set of the film I'm doing---The Mystery Men.

BowiefromHolland: Eddie what music do u like? and what do u think of Glam Rock and Bowie

Eddie Izzard: My music tastes are ecclectic. From Fat Boy Slim to Mozart and from David Bowie to Prodigy. And yes, I like the best of Glam.

LdyofDarkness: what's it like working with so many great people in Mystery Men? and only your second flick at that

Eddie Izzard: It's fun hanging out with people whos egos are competing with mine. But it's my fourth film. And, I'm getting used to meeting all these people. It's very day-to-day.

Bianca: What do you think of Monty Python?

Eddie Izzard: I think they're comic Gods.

Picadilly: What advice would you give to a young comic?

Eddie Izzard: Gig as often as you can, wherever you can. It's not until you've done 100 gigs that you get a sense of your own talent.

FruJu: Eddie: did you used to listen to the Goon show when you were growing up?

Eddie Izzard: Yes I listened to the Goons. Spike Milligan (who wrote the Goons) is the godfather of British alternative comedy.

KelMarSupervixen: How do you know that your gig isn't going to suck?

Eddie Izzard: I think it probably will. That is the edge. I'll try and make it funny but 11,000 people is a pretty big gig.

leighc: Eddie I have a bet with my boyfriend about which brand of makeup you wear...

Eddie Izzard: I wear various brands of makeup, but MAC lipsticks are a favourite.

Picadilly: Are you anxious scared or both before you go onstage?

Eddie Izzard: Before Wembley I will be pissing myself. But, normally I'm kind of relaxed. The more gigs I do, the more relaxed I am.

KelMarSupervixen: Did you think that Sam Kinison was good? (I miss him.)

Eddie Izzard: From what I saw of Sam Kinison, I thought he was very talented. But he apparently used to do a lot of anti-gay material which I cannot swing with.

Rednik: Eddie: Tell us a joke!

Eddie Izzard: No.

Rednik: Fuck off then! LOL

Eddie Izzard: Rednik, if you know anything about my stuff (have you not done research?) you'll know I don't "do" jokes. It's a stream of consciousness--man. So you Fuck Off!

Total Blam Blam: How do you feel about the fact that David Bowie was often seen to favour clothing traditionally worn by women? For example only last week I saw him in Paris trying on a rhinestone encrusted sport bra - Do you think it is acceptable behaviour from a man of that age?

Eddie Izzard: Total It's almost the 21st Century and as I've said before, everyone should have total clothing rights. And age doesn't come into it as everyone should try and be funky until death.

Picadilly: What is your opinion of ventriloquists? Some comics view it as not being a talent.

Eddie Izzard: Some of them I quite like. And others I don't really quite like so much. Is that decisive enough?

BowiefromHolland: Eddie do you think Bowie should make a Comical Movie? Do u think Bowie is funny at all?

Eddie Izzard: Not unless he wants to. I think he has a good sense of humour but that might not be apparent in most of the characters he's played on film.

Total Blam Blam: Your name can be mis-heard as "Eddie Is 'ard" which got me to wondering if you are? Not in the biblical sense of course, but for example, if you and Mark Thomas were squabbling over a dressing room, could you handle yourself?

Eddie Izzard: Total My name is not made up...it's my real name. But I think I can handle myself in a dressing room fight.

Picadilly: If you are dying onstage, what do you say or do to win the aRaMOANa: IS THIS TOTAL BLAM BLAM AND PICADILLY CHAT?

udience back?

Eddie Izzard: If you're dying on stage, the best thing is just to stick to your material and believe in it, You can talk to the audience but you've got to know what you're doing. If someone heckles you, though, say back to them the first thing that comes into your head. If you say it quick enough, it will probably be funny and they won't be expecting it.

Eddie Izzard: Well, what's your question, then?

RaMOANa: Eddie, when will your site (www.izzard.com) have pics of you (and reviews) in Velvet Goldmine? - I've been waiting for weeks!

Eddie Izzard: Ramoana getting copyright for pictures is a tricky thing. Unofficial sites can post-up photos because they don't care about the copyright. I have to, I'm afraid. So, it should happen when we get the go-ahead.

Zardoz: Marathon or Snickers

Eddie Izzard: I'm okay with Snickers -- cause then you know what you're buying in different countries.

TwinkleToe: Do you have any thoughts on President Clintons empeachment? Do you think a cigar is a terrible thing to waste?

Eddie Izzard: I don't think he should be impeached. I think he should be censored and allowed to get on with it.

RaMOANa: Which end of the cigar do you think Monica got?

Eddie Izzard: Both!

spaceface: you once said that you would like to be a lesbian, do you still feel that way?

Eddie Izzard: I think that I AM a male lesbian. I don't need to want to be.

Picadilly: Can I open for you?

Eddie Izzard: No.

leighc: Eddie, do you ever log on to chatrooms and flirt with people?

Eddie Izzard: No, I haven't done that...do you?

Zardoz: What do you think that YOU will be doing when your 50+ ?

Eddie Izzard: More of the same - but different.

RaMOANa: Eddie - BOXERS OR BRIEFS OR COMMANDO like Bowie?

Eddie Izzard: Briefs.

Total Blam Blam: Hallo Eddie Izzard - David has admitted in interview that gravity is just beginning to get the better of his bum cheeks - With this in mind, do you envisage a time when you might resort to the comfort of an arse bra?

Eddie Izzard: No, my bum seems to be going upwards.

leighc: Is stand up comedy a cheap form of therapy?

Eddie Izzard: Yes. Totally. It's one of the most truthful creative mediums. Normally rock and roll people and film stars have to keep up a certain front. But in stand-up, you can tell everyone how shit your life is and people pay you for it.

Eileen: Is time long or is it wide, and do you think it is combustible?

Eddie Izzard: Time is circular.

leighc: SO now you're a film star are you putting on a front?

Eddie Izzard: Absolutely.

Total Blam Blam: How do you feel about Bowie stretching the realms of acceptability, or pushing the envelope, whatever that means, when he apparently promotes bestiality in the song Ziggy Stardust, with the line "Making love to his seagull"?

Eddie Izzard: I think if you live an alternative lifestyle and you create an alternative style, it is your duty to push things and try-out stuff that might make people say "Hey--freaky". And he's making love to his EGO, by the way.

wildgirl: What's the best thing about being a transvestite?

Eddie Izzard: Free booze!

leighc: You clearly have a close relationship with your dad. Would you like to be a father yourself?

Eddie Izzard: Yes, my dad is very cool. And, one day I would like to be a father/mother (I think I'm the ultimate one parent family)

Total Blam Blam: humour eddie humour - I know it's fucking Ego ya mad basatard!

Eddie Izzard: I knew you knew, that was the joke.

Stumpy: did you have a good birthday? What did you do'

Eddie Izzard: I gambled in Vegas.

Total Blam Blam: I knew you knew I knew, that was my joke.

Eddie Izzard: We're obviously both very funny.

Picadilly: where was your first gig?

Eddie Izzard: At the Banana Cabaret, Balham London in 1987.

Eddie Izzard: I was crap!

Rednik: Eddie: Are you a frustrated rock star?

Eddie Izzard: No, I'm a frustrated film star.

Eddie Izzard: Five more questions guys. I've got to go and eat melon.

Spider: we will hold you down and tickle ya if ya dont lighten up ;-)

Eddie Izzard: You try answering these questions at speed and being witty. It's a bit of a mind-fuck.

Bianca: When have you first met Bowie?

Eddie Izzard: He came to my gig in New York in May of last year.

Rednik: If you had a paint spray can in your hand what statement would you write on the wall?

Eddie Izzard: Bollocks!

spaceface: did you like his music before that?

Eddie Izzard: Yes.

Bianca: Would you like to do a remake of "Some like it hot" together with Bowie?

Eddie Izzard: Maybe.

Stumpy: Best of luck for the Wembley Gig, it's the day afetr my birthday, and I'll be in hospital, getting new knees, any words of wisdom for me?

Eddie Izzard: Yes. get extra knees while you're there.

Eddie Izzard: Sorry I can't answer all your questions, see you at Wembley. Thanks for coming! Bye.

Eddie Izzard: Thanks to all, ta ta


*** Eddie Izzard (outside1@DPA) has left #ChatGuest


Session Close: Thu Feb 11 23:17:11 1999